making myself happy with dinosaurs merr chrismas
A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says ”Five beers, please.”
i dont get it
I hate that I actually laughed
Texts between me and my boss. He doesn’t believe it’s possible to rip phone books in half.
1: My boss is coolbro
2: I can rip phonebooks in half.
Instance: Flipping an ordinary 2-sided coin.
-Standard Universal Logic:
Each side has roughly a 50% chance of landing face up, excluding any differences in weight cause by the designs.
Both sides have an equal, yet no chance to land face up or down unless it’s a Tuesday. The wind must also be blowing directly down onto the table you flipped the coin on. So long as that table is made of spruce and you’ve polished it twice a week with Pledge cleaner, but only the lemon kind, the coin will have a -3% chance of doing nothing, because you were so busy waiting for it to choose a side to land on that you’ve neglected to make pancakes. Now the coin has gone without breakfast and is on strike until its demands of world domination are met. Of course, due to the coin being an inanimate object, it has no ability to lead a planet and therefore gives up and decides to land perfectly balanced on the edge between the two sides, where it will be frozen there until the next full moon when Jupiter is visible from the skylight. If you have flipped said coin in a room that has no skylight, hang a mirror from the ceiling pointed at the nearest window to simulate a skylight. Afterward, you may go to the nearest vending machine, where the coin will grant you one pack of Hostess cupcakes, even if that machine does not sell them.
On Tuesdays, the coin will always land on Tails. No exception.
Gentlemen and women, take note. [x]
Who needs to take note when apparently there are magical, self-tying bowties.
ITS TRANSPARENT YOU JUST CAUGHT MY BLOG.
Everyone needs a transparent pokeball on your blog, you just have to.
sometimes i think that i am not so stereotypical of an american
and then i remember that i consider the coke freestyle machine one of the greatest modern inventions
i mean look at this thing
over 100 choices, computerized mixing, one spout, touch screen, ice dispenser
trying to lower a pokemon’s HP so you can catch it but you get a critical hit and it faints